Remember when you were a kid and there were all those awesome animals telling you that you needed to drink Um Bongo? So you begged your mum to buy you some from the shop and she came back with that piss flavoured Netto version and told you it would be just the same?

Maybe that\'s just me. But imagine that scenario. Imagine the drink of all drinks. Compared to something that some crazy Scandinavian dude thought tasted like that drink, which had been shipped half-way round the world (who even knows where Nettoland is?) The case was then probably used for the netto manager Betty to get fingered out by the delivery man over.

This foul tasting liquid in a carton was then left to sit out on the shelves of Netto for years. A place which was only really used for old men to buy cheap white lightening.

One day, your mum went to this zombie apocalypse style \"shop\" and saw what she thought was the drink you had been begging for for weeks.

You try this drink, giving you your first true realisation of what people meant when they said \"tastes like piss\".

You are ashamed of this drink. Your mum keeps trying to put one in your lunch box, yet you keep hiding it in the bushes on your way to school. Looking back years later, you realise this was a bad idea, as it seems to have turned the ground rotten, and nothing can grow there anymore. Leaving some poor old lady, with broken dreams of her once beautiful garden.

If only mum had bought you Um Bongo.

Well this juice is somewhere between netto umbongo and the real deal. Probably only recommend buying if you\'re bored or your mum used to buy your fake um bongo from a more reputable retailer than Netto.